It's broken

The Corporate World Is Fundamentally Broken, not just my role!

Today was one of those days. AGAIN!

The kind that starts badly and then works very hard to get worse. The kind that leaves you blinking back tears in a Teams meeting. But people notice, the ones aligned, they notice.

A "Huddle" where people blow smoke up each others arses - even though the program is on fire, a steaming fxcking turd - rolled in various colours of glitter, still smelly and not pretty. Christ almighty, this bullshit "fluff stuff" sent me well and truly over the edge today.

And weirdly, like someone was watching over me, a meeting appeared in my diary, from my Line Manager, a check in to see how things are. Roll on Monday. Maybe I should share this blog?

By mid-morning, I had cried. Quietly. Professionally. The way seasoned corporate employees do, camera off, mic muted, soul briefly leaving body.

By lunchtime, I was exasperated in that hollow, bone-deep way that no amount of deep breathing or “reset walks” can fix. And by mid-afternoon, I found myself staring into the middle distance thinking: How the actual f**k do I get out of this?

This thought has been on repeat since 2022.

Because here’s the thing: the corporate world isn’t just tired. It’s broken.

We talk endlessly and say nothing. We workshop the obvious. We schedule meetings to prepare for meetings that exist solely to confirm what we already knew but were apparently too afraid to say plainly. Decisions are “socialised" but not logged, so no one fxcking knows, we wait until the next round of the same discussion.

And then there’s that guy. You know the one. Loud confidence, light substance. An ego so overinflated it needs its own risk register. He speaks exclusively in borrowed phrases and says things like “let’s kick the tyres on this” while contributing absolutely nothing of value. No insight. No ownership.

We are drowning in mediocre frameworks, roadmaps and decks. There's no shortage of decks. There is no accurate plan. Everyone is “aligned” and no one is actually doing anything. Problems aren’t solved, they’re renamed. Risks aren’t addressed, they’re parked. Reality is managed like a PR issue.

And the people? Most of them are decent. Smart. Trying. Which somehow makes it worse. Because we’re all trapped in a system that rewards endurance over honesty and compliance over clarity.

By the end of the day, I wasn’t angry anymore. I was just tired. The kind of tired that makes you question your life choices, your career trajectory, and whether you could realistically make a living running a small bookshop by the sea.

I don’t want to “kick the tyres.”I want to drive the car somewhere better. Or leave it by the side of the road and walk off with my dignity intact.

Thank goodness it's the weekend. Monday, I’ll log back in. I’ll be polite. I’ll nod. I’ll contribute thoughtfully. But tonight, I’m allowed to say it out loud:

"This is not working. And I don’t think it’s me."

I have still not started zoloft - my reasoning is, why should I? It's my bxllshit work environment causing the distress - surely I should not have to medicate to cope?

The corporate circus rages on, I’ll keep slapping on my clown face.